TechOpinionation - Humor

I couldn't have said it any better, Dell

nospam@example.com (Joshua Kugler) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 12:50:37 +0000

Dell sent me another one of their catalogs recently, which included this entry. You can get Windows Vista, or a "bonus" of an Windows XP Professional downgrade. I have nothing left to add.

When marketing gets ahead of engineering

nospam@example.com (Joshua Kugler) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 12:29:42 +0000

Bob (from marketing): I have this great new idea for our product!
Joe (from engineering): Lay it on me!
Bob: Let's make our product easier to use! People will love it!
Joe: OK, we'll need three months to develop and test that feature.
Bob: Great! We'll start advertising the new feature immediately.
Joe: Uh.....

What happened next? The photo says it all.

Be Careful Who You Prank

nospam@example.com (Joshua Kugler) — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 09:53:21 +0000

I had this conversation this morning via a random AOL IM sent to me:

(10:09:04) AtypicalCoho: If you respond with an away message containing a phone number, I will laugh... then rickroll you by phone.
(10:10:08) Me: I am not available. If you need to contact me, please call 907-451-5100
(10:11:42) AtypicalCoho: who the h*** is this?
(10:12:08) Me: You tell me...you IM'ed me.

I can only assume he tried the number. It's for the Fairbanks office of the Alaska State Troopers. I don't think I'll be hearing from him again.

Get a better one

nospam@example.com (Joshua Kugler) — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 14:42:27 +0000

Last January, coming home from my Boston trip, I was sitting in Chicago O'Hare aiport, desperately searching for free wifi, when I looked at my kernel log messages. But, what to my frustrated eyes should appear, than another example of the humor of Open Source developers, specifically, the developers of the NetworkManager framework:

NetworkManager: request_and_convert_scan_results(): card took too much time scanning. Get a better one.

Granted, this warning is probably warranted. I was using a 802.11b card that is several years old, plus the calls are going through NDIS Wrapper. It was time to get a new laptop. The one was using was a Dell Inspiron 4000: PIII-800, 384MB of RAM, no built LAN or WiFi.

Geek bands

nospam@example.com (Joshua Kugler) — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 17:53:35 +0000

A band for programmers tired of automata:

Rage Against the State Machine

Thanks, I'll be here all year.

Making stew

nospam@example.com (Joshua Kugler) — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 15:30:00 +0000

Original, as far as I know. Correct me if you know otherwise.

Q: How do you program a computer to make beef stew?

A: You use bullion logic.

As bad, but not as good:

Q: How do you solve a math equation involving beef stew?

A: You use bullion algebra.

Edit: For those of you who got here by searching for "bullion logic" what you're actually searching for is boolean logic.